Struggling with moderation

This month of February is a short one.  I thought what better time to try and implement some routines and habits that I’m trying to instill.  See if I can do it for the month.  I’m seeking moderation in my life overall.  In work, in exercise, eating and drinking, shopping, socializing.  All of it.  A balanced life.

It is proving difficult.  But enlightening.  I’m still a bit underemployed.  Yes, I have another job now in addition to the sporadic banquet schedule for the winter at the golf course.  I work 5 days a week, but only 4 1/2 to 5 1/2 hours most nights.  Oh, and there’s the night thing.  I’m finding it hard to make good use of my days knowing I have to drop everything and get ready for work by late afternoon. Not to mention, it leaves less time with my BF in the evenings.  So I have a lot of time to myself in the daytime.

Ideally, I’d spend some of this time each day with a workout to start the day on the right foot.  I seem to be struggling with this.  I don’t know if it’s the grey skies of winter or what.  I did go run with a friend this Wednesday and it was great.  But that was one of my days off.  I get this weird feeling of being caught unprepared if I have to work that night.  Irrational, but true.  So most times I just stay home until I start my shift at 4 or 5.  Not very productive.  I mean, the laundry is done, lol, but I’m not fully experiencing life by sitting at home.

Another thing I’m working on is decreasing my wine intake.  It’s just better for my health and well being.  Interestingly, having a glass or two was more of a distraction than anything else, I realize.  Something to do with my down time.  I also found that not having the wine led me to window shopping online.  Again, a distraction.  Obviously, these are behaviors I’m using to fill the void.  I’m so much better now at only buying clothing that is on my list, but I still fall prey to looking, looking, looking when I’m bored.

The next step is of course to figure out what I want to do with my days.  They are going to pass, regardless, so I may as well make good use of them!  I think this will be a big part of what my February will show me.  How do I want to fill my time?  What activities will help me grow and fulfill me?

When in FL I did not work, and spent much of my time running and training for races.  Then, when we would move back home I historically worked 2 jobs and had no time.  Now I am trying for that middle ground.  I have applied for a position that is 30 to 32 hours a week, benefits, many shifts earlier than my current job.  Perfect.  But the waiting to hear back is killing me!!  Argh.  Okay, a little off tangent there he he.  I’m hoping I get it, and that it helps move me ever closer to that balanced life, with a normal schedule that I fill with equal amounts quality time with my BF, social time with my friends, and workout time to improve my overall well being.

In the meanwhile I’m sitting on my hands to avoid clicking the BUY button on the computer or grabbing the corkscrew to open up a bottle of wine or slipping yet another cookie out of the bag.  Perhaps when those urges strike I should quite literally fill my hands – with a pair of dumbbells!

How do you balance your time?  Do you feel you lead a balanced life?  What would you change if you could?


6 thoughts on “Struggling with moderation

  1. If you like to get online and look around, can you do that with something that doesn’t make you want to buy? Maybe hairstyles or recipes. Song lyrics. I love to search, and I too would like to limit what I want and what I buy.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good post Mo. I can strong identify. I also strive for moderation in my life, balance and what I call moderately minimal in terms of my clothing and possessions. Back when I worked a split shift (with both a.m. and p.m. hours and a large chunk of time between) I felt much like you are feeling now. What I did to fill in the time is read, which is something I love to do anyway. And in order to not spend money or add more books to my shelves, I get Kindle books from the library and in my free time I search for the books I want to read.

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  3. It’s worth noting that this afternoon after spinning my wheels and feeling general stir craziness, I bid on a $5 cream bustier style tank on eBay. The typical cheap pick me up, even in a somewhat questionable style for me moving toward 45. Not on my list and not in the plan. I’m sure I’ll wear it (I already pictured looser pants and skirts with the slimness of the top and jackets to put over it) but it’s a bit of a back slide in the how and why of acquisition.


  4. I think some people who work later shifts never get over that feeling of spending the day waiting to get ready for work. I was one of those people. On the other hand I have a friend who works at 4 pm, and she goes on a long daily hike, quilts and cooks, right up until time to get ready for work. We’ve discussed this, and I just don’t get it but for some people (me, me!) the “regular” day shift hours just work out better psychologically. I hope you get the new job! And good for you on the moderation mindset. I need to be more mindful of moderating some things as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Funny, I used to be that person who could go to the gym first, have lunch with friends, whatever and then work. I guess I lost that a decade ago lol! Good news, though, I got offered the grocery position this morning and should have less of those late starts.
      Hoping this is a great start to a better scheduled day and more balance overall.


  5. I find myself doing the same thing on a non work day when I have an appointment or somewhere to go in the afternoon. I always feel like I’ll never be able to finish if I start something, even when I don’t have to get ready for hours. I always feel like I’m watching the clock.
    Good luck with the new job!

    Liked by 1 person

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